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Sputum for Katie Couric

I never thought I'd be posting about this, but a while back I was a writer/producer for CBS News. Around the newsroom, we all knew about Katie Couric's reputation. No, I'm not talking about her former cheerleading career, or her current cheerleading career for the Democratic Party.

I'm talking about the "s" word. We all knew Katie hated the word and would strike out against anyone who used it. With that knowledge throbbing in my mind, I presented Katie with a "special" script I'd written for her.

Enquirer: Boozing Katie Couric Collapses!

I transcribe the National Enquirer covers so you don't have to, and the latest edition says she went on a "shocking rampage". They also describe her "torment" at CBS, with this purported quote: "I MADE A BIG MISTAKE".

Plus! Her "battle with depression", and her "secret love" is "17 years younger!"

Katie Couric ratings nightmare!

Drudge is reporting that the ratings for the CBS Evening News with Katie Couric are behind NBC and ABC in the top seven markets. Even worse, in Los Angeles Couric is beaten by re-runs of "Friends", "King of Queens", and "Malcolm in the Middle".

Katie Couric ratings: still third place

Plucky, perky Katie Couric is still bravely soldiering on and cheerleading for the Democrats despite being in third place according to Nielsen. Here are the ratings for the November sweeps period:

Total viewers

NBC: 9,570,000

ABC: 8,920,000

CBS: 7,780,000

Did the VRWC sabotage the Katie Couric Show?

One version of tonight's Katie Couric Show - aka the CBS Evening News - finished four minutes early, apparently due to "technical problems". In the big time world of television broadcasting - especially with shows as history-rich as CBS's entertaining and informative news broadcasts - such mistakes are nearly unheard of.

Hear Katie Couric say "old sperm"

While Katie Couric has no doubt said "sperm" on TV before, and has said "old" thousands of times on TV, if you want to hear her say those two words together, see this video. After about two minutes of blather and a worthless peak inside the CBS newsroom as they make sausage and prepare you propagandize the U.S., you can watch attentively as the phrase "old sperm" comes out of her mouth. (Via this)

Tabloid: Katie Couric fired by CBS!

Breaking, quite-possibly-true news: Katie Couric has been fired by CBS News, the National Enquirer reports in a World Exclusive. No details yet available... picture of the magazine cover here... developing... must credit Hot Sop...


Hear Katie Couric say "old sperm"

Katie Couric perky, upbeat about plummeting ratings

The only person on planet Earth who's still watching CBS Evening New with Katie Couric informs us that she's still "upbeat" despite no one else watching the show. She is reportedly "feeling great" and is "having a great time".

Oblivious to the fact that she's been rejected by all Americans, the former (sports) cheerleader and current Democratic Party cheerleader says:

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